Tame performance Anxiety: 6 Tools for Student-Athletes & Parents
- Sarah Greene- Falk
- Oct 20
- 4 min read
Do you ever experience this?
Do you feel your chest tighten or mind go blank when the spotlight is on you?
Do you tend to freeze up, forget what you're doing or mess up when expectations are high?
Does your mind race, over‐think or worry about how you’ll look instead of what you’ll do?
Does trying to balance school, sport, family and future feel overwhelming at times?
If so—you’re not alone. Many student-athletes seek help because performance anxiety is the #1 reason they reach out to PsychEdge. Studies show young athletes are especially vulnerable to worry, fear of evaluation, and weaker coping tools. (PMC)
Why does this happen?
In competition or big moments, the brain and body respond. Your heart rate increases, breathing gets fast and/or shallow, muscles tighten—and when these happen, the brain gets less oxygen and it gets harder to think clearly and rationally. (Verywell Mind) Also: the fear of negative evaluation (what others will think) and worrying about mistakes often drive the anxiety. (PMC) This creates a vicious back and forth between anxious feelings and irrational thoughts, each perpetuating the other.
In short, here are 6 coping tools for physical and mental to combat the stress, anxiety, pressure and distraction are hijacking them.
The PsychEdge approach (via the Peak Performance Course)
At PsychEdge we’ve structured a five-module system (you may already know this) that gives you the tools to handle these pressures. Here’s how they help with performance anxiety:
Module 1 – Mindfulness & Breathing: Calm your nervous system, get present, reset when you feel tense.
Module 2 – SMARTER Goals: When you know what you’re doing, you worry less about what you might look like.
Module 3 – Positive Self-Talk: Change the road your thoughts take so they become allies instead of enemies.
Module 4 – Growth Mindset & Emotional Intelligence: See mistakes as part of the process; understand your emotions instead of letting them control you.
Module 5 – Visualization & Mental Imagery: Rehearse success in your mind so your body looks the part when it’s go-time.
If you’re struggling with anxiety during performance, these modules work together to build your mental game, so you are more prepared for performances and have 'go-to' skills.
6 Specific Tips to Tame Performance Anxiety
Here are actionable tools you can start using now:
1. Pre-Game “Reset” Routine
When you feel nerves creeping in, use Box Breathing: breathe in for 4 seconds, hold 4, out 4, hold 4 (repeat ~8-12 times or as many as you need).
Say your cue-phrase: e.g., “Focus on the task” or “Let's see what I can do”.
Visualize three things: what you’ll do (your skill), when you've successfully performed the skill, and how you’ll feel (calm, strong, ready) when you perform successfully now.
This routine is part of Module 1 and Module 5 in our course.
2. Focus on What You Can Control
Pressure often comes from focusing on what you can’t control (score, crowds, what others think). Instead, focus on:
Your breathing (counting)
Your stance, footwork, movement - Be where your feet are!
Your cue words to execute
Your micro-tasks (e.g., “get the next serve over”) What you will do.
These ideas come straight from sport-psych literature. (mojo.sport)
3. Use Positive/Neutral/Mindful Self-Talk
Rather than: “Don’t mess up”, use: “I’m ready. I’ve trained. I've done this before.”Even neutral self-talk (just stating facts keeps us mindful in the moment and helps us focus) is good: “I’ve done the prep. I’m ready. I'm doing this. I’m doing my job.”This is drawn from Module 3 of PsychEdge.
4. Break the Big Picture Into “Next Step” Goals
When the challenge feels huge (big game, big season), your brain can freeze.
Break it down:
“My first/next step: focus on warm-up, breathe, cue word(s).”
“My next moment: first 5 minutes, one thought/breath at a time.”
Use the SMARTER goals (Module 2) to set small process goals instead of outcome goals.
5. Post-Performance Check & Adjust
After your game/event, journal:
What felt good? What went well?
What felt off? What did I worry about?
How will I change my prep or mindset for next time?
This reflective practice builds emotional intelligence (Module 4) and helps you reduce future anxiety.
6. Parent & Coach Role (for those reading with their athlete)
Use language that emphasizes effort, process, learning, not just “win or lose.” (TrueSport)
Help build routines: quiet zone before game, minimal distractions, breathing check-in.
Normalize the fact that nerves are okay. They don’t mean you’re unprepared—they mean you care. (Johns Hopkins Medicine)
Reflection Questions
When have you felt your anxiety creep in (game, try-out, test) and how did it show up in your body?
Which of these tools (breathing, self-talk, process goals) do you use now, and which one will you choose this week to practice?
What’s one small “next step” process goal you’ll commit to for your next competition or performance?
How can a parent, coach or teammate support you in this process (not just results)?
Final Thought
Performance anxiety doesn’t mean you’re weak—it means you’ve been given a physiological signal that something matters to you. The good news: Now, you have the tools to manage it. The more you practice daily over and over again, the better the skills will work for you when you need them.
By building presence and awareness with breathing, intentionally directing your focus, refining your inner voice, and breaking down the moment into manageable pieces, you give yourself a mental edge.
If you’re ready to go deeper, contact me sarah@psych-edge.com or check out the PsychEdge Peak Performance Course is designed to support you step by step—so you can step into your next performance not just ready to play, but ready to thrive.